Lady of Leisure

I have stopped working now for nearly a couple of months. It is a novel experience not to have to get up early and rush of to work at 6 30 am. The daily rush of work - emails, tutorials - both online and on phone, preparing teaching materials and teaching online, marking papers, helping out colleagues to work online and develop their modules for online delivery - and then returning home sometimes as late as 6 30 pm.

I enjoyed teaching and supporting my students. The challenge of getting that light bulb to flash on is always thrilling. So often the students need someone to believe in their abilities and help them get the confidence to become independent learners. I have heard from students making an inquiry about a degree program that talking to me has given them the confidence to think they can do it. Why do many teachers think that they have to ensure their academic importance by making students dependent on them? Can one not see that whatever the student becomes reflects on the kind of teacher you have been? Much as I enjoy the practice of helping people learn, it is a nice change to be able to just relax. Not rush about everyday, worry about keeping up with the loads of drafts waiting for feedback, marking judiciously all the scripts sitting on the table, responding to inquiries and writing of reports (some thing that's never ending).

Now I have time to stop and smell the roses... contemplate on important matters such as what will I do today? Call some friends? Meet up someone for lunch? rest as the bones are aching today? write mails or just play games? Contemplate on life and its meaning? Read fiction or indeed some spiritually uplifting text? One thing though is that keeping in touch with, establishing and maintaining relationship with family that I had lost touch with has become important to me. It is sad that time flies by and I have been busy .. with what you may ask? Well busy with work, busy earning to pay the mortgage, getting higher qualifications, wrapped up in my own world of work - home - sleep. I remembered the people I love everyday but had no time to get in touch and express that feeling of love. In the days gone by the phone calls were expensive and writing letters was never my forte nor of my friends and family. I just assumed that one day I can just start back the relationships which were on hold. It is not so easy and now I find that people have grown up and also grown apart. I have started calling people and making contact to get back into the fabric of family.

The social networking tool face book has proved to be very useful. I have got many of my nieces and nephews on it. Most of them I have not seen and a few I do know were very little when I last saw them. It is such a pleasure to find the younger generation fun to talk to. I have tried to develop a separate relationship with each one. Finding out who they are as individuals is enjoyable and also am proud of who they are becoming. There is also a singular lack of the gossiping and one-up-man ship traits of my generation which is endearing. The relationships are one to one and level of family discussions is very limited. Strangely I also find that while they all address me as aunt I get treated as a friend. I find myself cherishing these relationship and find that each person has found a space in my heart.

Another aspect I have discovered in during this leisure time is find the friends from my past. Got hold of a couple of ladies that I did my A levels with. Suddenly seeing each other as grown up with families felt strange. Then I found a few more people who were from College of Nursing AFMC Pune. It was good to get to know what people have been doing with their careers and about their families. It came as a surprise that many of them felt I have become serious. Upon reflection yes.. I was a monkey, always playing the fool and in the center of any prank going. Surely I have not become a serious and quiet person. Well I have changed a lot as family and work responsibilities have made me so.... but during this leisure time I am getting in touch again with my fun side. I have always had a good sense of humor and its only a matter to dig deep and find it. I know its easier said than done. But nevertheless I am slowly getting there. Telling myself time and again the positives of being fun gal helps.

So you see the start of leisure time has meant a journey of discovery of self and of family and friends. I find this is a very important journey in understanding myself and my relationships and the world that is mine. It allows me to see my place in the world and family and my contributions to it. Also its fun to reminiscence and see how far we have come in our lives.