I used to live in a house which
we think was from the 1930s or 40s. It was a fab house as it had 2 layered brick
walls which kept the house very cool no matter the heat outside. Even when temperatures
outside reached 40C+ it never got warmer than 29C indoors. But winter it was
really cold indoors. Maybe this why the builders had put in a massive fireplace.
I loved the idea of this fireplace and a wrought iron grate to burn wood for
the fire. While I was not going to build a fire indoors as I would not be able
to do the work required to make a fire and then clean the grate and of course
the smoke would have me wheezing in a minute, I loved the grate and thought I
would do some dry flowers and foliage arrangements.
The first sign of trouble came
when one day there was a big splat. I was sitting in the sofa next to the chimney,
listening to music and reading when I was startled. It was taking me some time
to get used to the various bird calls which were so loud as the front door was
open, that I used to get up and do a quick round through the house to make sure
no bird had got in. So, when the splat came, I jumped up to look around after all
the sound had been in the room. There was a slight movement and I saw a long
black lizard, the kind that is all over my garden, in the grate. I think it was
dazed for it took a minute to breath before rushing off towards the door and
escaping from under it.
Next happened a few days later. It
rains on and off here and some days it is a mild drizzle which is what has been
happening since I moved here. When I go to hoover the house, I would hoover
under the grate too and could not figure out why there was dampness. Was some
moisture coming down the chimney? Then we had a massive storm and next thing I
know I hear the rain and think ‘wow even the rain seems to be in the house’.
But better check it out so I get up and see this puddle on the floor on the
other side of the coffee table. Then I see the rain pouring in through the
chimney. Damn this is the first time I have seen a chimney that is built
straight and so the pouring rain brings it right down into the house. I had a
few words with the estate agent and got very little joy. I used to put papers in
the grate and that would absorb the water when it rained. This drama went of
for a couple of years before the landlord (who insisted on doing all the
repairs himself) was forced to come to do something about it.
The last one was most mystifying.
It was a cold grey day with rain expected later. The wind was blowing big gusts
every now and then. I was quietly listening to some music and then I heard this
sound that can be best described as something between a long moan and a cry. A
long wwoooooooooohhhh……. It was such a sad and worry sound. By now I am tuned
to run to the chimney the first thing. I stood near the grate and tried to peer
up the chimney and got a full blast of that eerie moan. Now I thought maybe
there is a bird trapped in there. That it may have flown in and could not just
fly back out. How does one get a bird out of the chimney? Who do I call? The estate
agent will probably shrug her shoulders. Do I call 000 and ask for firies to
come for the bird removal? Or is it the RSPCA? I thought let me rattle a stick
or the broom up the chimney and see. But if it comes inside the house down the chimney
how am I going to get it to go out again?
But nothing happened except another big coooooooo. Yes, then I realised
that a pigeon was sitting on the chimney looking down the hole and cooing. Did
it want me to coo back? I had a chuckle and told all my friends about being
serenaded down the chimney. It was back a few times over 2 years cooing at me.
Interesting things happen to come
down my chimney. The current house has one but is boarded up and fortunately I
do not think it is a straight one.
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